My Memories of You
by nanu107
Summary: Her kiss, as he was about to leave her sitting on her comfy train seat, was a little chaste thing, letting a word undiscovered and a promise of something more. It was also her very last kiss.
1. Chapter 1

**My Memories of You**

Author's Ramblings: I realized something, my fanfics are way too much complicated to be simple one shot pieces... What makes me cry a lot because I really love to write them. *sigh* Done during a sleepless night and after not studying for and exam!

Enjoy!

"Do I really have to go?" Asked Kaoru, wearing her yellow kimono, hair tied up with a large ribbon and holding a small round bag that matched her outfit perfectly. It was amazing how well she could dress up in traditional clothing even when the world out there didn't care much for tradition. Kenshin placed her small bag over one of the empty benches and smiled at her.

"Sure you do; it's the first weekend you can get away from the renovation work. You should enjoy it with your friends, that you should. Besides you are getting married soon and won't visit them as often." He soothed with a soft voice, pulling her into a calm embrace.

"And why is that?" She seemed amused, touching the neckline of his blue polo and looking up at him with innocent eyes.

"Because I'm pretty sure your husband won't let you out of his sight."

"Oh, really?" and she giggled as he leaned and kissed his nose.

"Really, really." And the train arrived.

"But Kenshin, I want to stay with you, I don't wanna go." She was about to throw a tantrum, he knew. Kaoru was a very independent woman, having raised her youngest brother and took care of her oldest (who behaved just like a boy), worked and kept house. She wasn't use to someone taking decisions in her behalf. Kenshin had bought her the ticked, so she could visit Megumi and Tae in Kyoto before they married, and she wasn't too happy about it, even when she had complained of not been able to see Megumi that often. Kenshin kissed her lips softly and pulled into a tight hug, right now avoiding a tantrum would have it benefits.

"By the time you come back the dojo will have brand new floors, the hot water will be running, and we'll be able to have a wonderful wedding under the blooming sakura tree in the garden. That I do promise. Does that make you feel any better?"

"The hot water will be running?"

"And we'll have a beautiful wedding." He said with a smile.

"Don't care about the wedding if we don't have hot water."

"Kaoru!"

She kissed him, softly on the lips. Both their eyes closed and Kenshin held her as the echo of a voice requesting all passenger of the train to Kyoto blurted for their boarding. They pulled apart and quickly moved into the train, Kenshin found her seat and placed her baggage over the seat, turning to leave but not without a little something.

If he had known, Kenshin would have made the moment memorable. He would have probably knelt down and propose to her again, or spin her around, or just sat down and hands linked would have traveled anywhere with her.

Her kiss as he was about to leave her sitting on her comfy train seat, was a little chaste thing, letting a word undiscovered and a promise of something more. It was also her very last kiss. Kenshin waved at Kaoru as the train moved away and for some reason as the train picked up speed she got up and watched him through the clear glass window, waving at him as if desperate for letting Kenshin know she cared. She loved him. Soon she became nothing but a blur of yellow and dark strands of hair.

The train wreck report situated the train wreck at about 10:23, 30 minutes right after he'd left the station. Of course Kenshin had got the news much later, at about 1:45. He'd been fighting the contraption that would provide hot water for their blue and white tile bathroom when Sanosuke, Kaoru's older brother, walked into the large bathroom, pale as a sheet of paper and eyes red. Kenshin had been under the sink to notice the man's pale features.

"Kenshin," He said in a rough voice, raw with emotion. At that moment a spray of hot water escaped the sink and drenched Kenshin who hurried to close the water pipes. The smaller man got up laughing, commenting on how difficult a plumber's work was, and how Kaoru would be laughing at his predicament. Just then did he notice Sano. "Kenshin, there was an accident. Kaoru's train..."

"Accident? What sort of an accident?"

Sano took a second longer than needed to answer. "The fatal sort of accident."

Suddenly the water drenching him wasn't so warm.

Kenshin actually drove to the scene of the accident, and was horrified to see the train was literally in pieces. The back of his mind provided that it was a good thing Yahiko had fallen asleep on the way there, and would not see this... particular scene. Sano was behind Kenshin, equally horrified.

_I have to find her_. His mind provided. How frighten must she be, how much she must have cried. He needed to find Kaoru. Taking several steps forward, Kenshin crossed the yellow line around the accident, which was pretty long, and was soon stopped by an office. Sano behind yelled for Kenshin to come back, but he wouldn't listen. "Let me go! I have to find her!" He fought the office, actually getting him down and advancing deeper into them mess, Sano following suit to bring him back.

"Kaoru!" He cried, his voice swallowed by the sound of machine drilling to try and get the living out of the mess, and mixing with other shouts. "Kaoru!" Rain started to fall as he moved deeper into the mess, and climbing onto the rails, Kenshin looked at the scene at the other side of the small mountain created by the train rails.

A hellish fire overtook most of the carts, moving from the first passenger's cart down to the third. There were cries for help, cries of emergency rescue teams, paramedics, children, woman, men... Suddenly someone was pulling him back, and Kenshin struggled to move forward. But to what really? Deep down he knew Kaoru was too fragile to have survived.

"Let me go! Sano! She's in there! She's frightened I must find her! Kaoru!" Another tall man got a good hold of Kenshin, who kept struggling. "She needs me! Kaoru!"

"you need to leave, now! Only emergency personnel." Said the taller man, making Kenshin turn to him in utter disbelief. "My wife's there! I have to find her!" It took the strength of the two taller men to bring Kenshin back to his car, and a strong sedative to put him down. Only later, when Kenshin woke up in the emergency room receiving the living and death of the accident did the smaller man learned that Sanosuke had given the other tall man a picture of Kaoru so he could search for her and know where to take her. Kenshin learned the man's name was Aoshi Shinomori, and memorized he was a sergeant of the small police station a few blocks away so he could send a thank you note later.

The next 46 hours were grueling, long, and desperate.

Megumi arrived after having heard the news, and took care of Yahiko. She also made sure both Sanosuke and Kenshin got something to eat, although the second one was more reluctant eat than ever. But as his older sister she forced some food down his throat along with vitamins and water. Lots of water. Several staff member watched over them, knowing their story, and along with other family members they waited. AS injured and lifeless bodies were brought in the room slowly emptied, and when Sargent Shinomori entered only Sano and Kenshin were sitting there. Sano was resting with his arm dropped over the back of the empty chair next to him, a chair away Kenshin, head held against his laced fingers and eyes closed, almost as if in prayer, the redhead was rocking back and forth obviously desperate.

The first to notice him was Kenshin, who stopped rocking and gave him a good look. His eyes watered, almost was if he knew what the man was about to tell him, and then turned away.

"Did you find her?"

"No."

"I put her in the train, she was wearing a yellow kimono and ribbon. You have her picture. Get back there and find her." As a business man Kenshin was used to give orders and have people obey him, so when Aoshi stayed on the doorway he wasn't very please. "Didn't you hear me? Move!" He launched forward, getting up in a tense stance. Sano got ready to get between the two men to avoid any sort of fight, surprised.

Shinomori just shook his head. "We- I found her luggage and handbag, but no trace of her. You must take into consideration how extensive the damage was; We'll have to wait for DNA matched on the..."

"Wha... DNA matches on what?"

"Her body might have suffered extensive damage or burned. We'll have to id the body parts with DNA." Kenshin's movements were so fast not even Sano could have predicted what happened Kenshin got up and pushed against Shinomori's body until the tall sergeant was against the nearest wall, forearm pressed against his neck. Kenshin's eyes burned amber and dangerous.

"She's not dead!" He gritted out with such poison in his voice even Sano gave a step back. "Get out there and find her."

"The search efforts have been called off. There's nothing but clean up teams up there."

"That's what you pull me away for! So I can give up and let her die! She's alive so get out there and find her!" Aoshi struggled against him, and was able to push him off, surprised at the small man's strength. Soon there was a short struggled which ended with Kenshin's chest and face pressed against the nearest wall, arms held back by the tall police officer. "You deny me my wife's burial! Get off of me! Kaoru! Kaoru!" He repeated this several times, and only stopped when he himself slammed his forehead against the wall, wailing. Literally wailing as a lost soul would wail for heaven. The officer let the man slid down to the floor, releasing his arms. Nurses and doctors moved about them, surprised, and those who knew why they were there leaned back and let sorrow take them, some nurses even cried with the news. "You deny me my wife's burial." He let out in a soft sob unable to stop crying. Sano was against the door frame, crying as well but trying to keep together for Kenshin's sake.

Suddenly Megumi was pushing Aoshi away. "Move aside!" She quickly knelt by her brother's side and pulled him from the wall, checking his forehead and cleaning the blood as he tried to curl into a ball on her lap. "_Oneesan_..." He moaned and sobbed, disappearing against the softness of her cotton blouse.


	2. Chapter 2

**My Memories of You  
*****_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_***

Author's Ramblings: Did you guys know I'm supposed to be writing about FMP not RK… *Goes crazy* I'm sorry! I'm really sorry! My muse is crazy that way! *Calms down* I promise to finish the first story soon.

He'd been quiet the whole day.

Sano knew why so he just moved about his friend in a quiet routine. He'd gotten the mail, got some work done and fixed lunch. They had both gotten up late so it was a rather large meal of which neither took more than three bites, and avoided the tea because it was not exactly green. So Sano didn't know how to make good tea, so what? After that Sano went on working, making a few important phone calls and then finishing up earlier than usual, after all a friend was in need. When he escaped the confines of his office, a little storage room they had turned into their business' headquarters, Sano noticed how quiet it had turned; usually some music could be heard filtering through the doors of the actual dojo and Sano would be getting ready for practice. But not today.

Today was special. Although so very sad, special.

Feet clad in white socks, Sano moved to the hallway that lead to the rooms, and stood outside his best friend's, of course a little worried. He knocked softly, and when there was no answer he slid the door open. Here there was no such thing as lock on doors, alright, maybe three years ago there were locks on their doors, but not anymore.

The tall man could see red hair dropping from the side of the bed, messed because of it's owner. He could also see the huge mess of books and pictures and a particular large blue ribbon over the near by desk. Nothing weir there, it was the same mess he cleaned every year. The man on bed was small, curled into a ball and shaking. HIs red hair was messy, covering the entire pillow, and his clothing was unusually crumpled.

"Oi, Kenshin." There was no response from the shell of the man on bed, and Sano just sighed. Nothing weir there. "What do you want for dinner?" Again no answer, but Sano entered the room, knowing it was safe ground (at least for him) and started to pick up after his silent friend. "Pizza it is then. I'll call Yahiko and let him know about dinner. Is Megumi coming over tonight?"

Of course she was: it was a really stupid question. But he knew that this little ritual needed to be completed, even if it was grotesque and depressing in nature. Inside his good friend's head something utterly strange was happening, and a script had to be recited, even when he couldn't remember the exact words and to remember them was getting really hard; after all it was an event three years old and although painful...

"Sano?" Said his friend's soft voice, amazing Sano. Never in three years had he interrupted... "I want a hamburger." Sano dropped the book he'd picked up, staring at Kenshin. For a moment neither spoke and Sano wasn't sure of what to do. Of course his first thought was to pick up the nearest phone and call the emergency line; this man had finally lost it! But he nodded.

"Any fast food joint?"

"And ice cream. Chocolate ice cream."

"Right, are you joining us for dinner?"

"After a shower."

"Alright, I'll call Yahiko and Megumi."

"Sano?"

"Hmm?"

"Don't call Tomoe, please?"

"As you wish." And so Sanosuke just walked out of the room in total shock. He searched his jean's pocked and pulled out his phone, calling Yahiko, who hopefully was on his way home from school with Misao, and let them know about the slight change of plans for dinner. They were also very surprised.

'  
'

Kaoru met Kenshin seven years prior.

She'd been nothing but a freshman at the same university they were attending, and while Kenshin had been the so called _sempai_, with the glasses and brain to tutor the young woman, he'd been getting to know her slowly. He was a serious, quiet man that for a whole year had Kaoru going insane. Upon setting eyes on him she'd fallen, Sano knew because every day she would come home to discharge the day's sighting, following, and if possible (heaven's forbid) conversation she had with this mysterious tutor. Kaoru even failed her class because she was following him for looks and not for the tutoring.

Sano, who had been pulling all nighters just to pay the tuition, had to sit her down and ask her to stop following the man around because she was wasting _his_ money. And after a good night's cry she was ready to tackle the class (_and_ the man) for and _A_, and probably even a date. If she got lucky. Then came summer break and during the recess the two brothers, Sano and Yahiko, were so fed up with the woman missing the tutor they actually went to the university to see if they could find him, and ask him to end their suffering and probably make clear that he was not interested in her. It was as if that talking too had no effect at all. Upon searching the entire campus, and asking at the department (Kaoru's department, they had no idea what department the man was in) one funny thing happened.

"_Oi_, miss." Asked Sano, in his usual gruff tone. "We are searching for a guy." The secretary sitting there just smiled.

"As you know this is a university and there are lots of _guys_ around. Do you know the name?"

"No." Said Sano quickly, thinking in all those nights Kaoru talked about the man and did not share his name. "Would you settle with a description?" The woman took a deep breath and leaned back on her chair, about to call the cops: Sano knew the look; the cops had been called over a lot while he was around. But she seemed also very amused at the fact they were trying real hard to find this guy.

"Very well, you don't seem like gang members so…"

"Gang members?" Asked Yahiko, surprised. "I'll have you know we are the teachers of the _Kamiya Kasshin Ryo_! We are decent people." A moment of silence. "Except rooster head here who's a moron."

"_Oi, oi_." Said Sano, about to his the younger sibling, then scoffed and turned to the woman. "About this guy: he's short, red hair, purple eyes; has the cutest ass this side of Mt. Fuji."

"And also is a tutor with gold rimmed glasses." Said Yahiko, sharing his two cents in. The woman before them slammed her hands down while quickly getting up.

"What do you want with Ken-chan?" She cried, quickly blushing, surprising the two brothers.

"_Ken_..."

"_Chan_?" Asked the brothers while leaning back. The back door of the office opened and a man, who the two brothers had just described, stepped out, and upon finding the scene halted. He must have heard his name been cried out because he seemed curious to find out what was happening there; he wore a white shirt, dark slacks and had big eyes that shone with the light from the sun; not the pale light of the office's lamps… He was full of light, yet calm, he was fierce yet peaceful. It was an odd combination that fit perfectly within him. And the aura he let out… Sano narrowed his eyes, and fell quiet while the newcomer blinked at them.

"Why, hello." He said softly, looking the two men over. "You two seem familiar."

"Are you Kenshin?"

"Yes, can I help you?"

"Can we talk outside?"

"Of course." And with a small smile, he took off his glasses, his wild red hair flaming against the pale painting of the wall and his white shirt, he smiled at the secretary who tried to stop him.

"Kenshin-san, they are gang members!"

"It's alright," He assured her softly, and had her melting on the chair.

"We are not gang members!" Cried Yahiko, been pulled by his brother out the door. Kenshin followed, more curious than worried and they stopped outside, right under the shade of a well planted tall tree. Sano turned, and spit out the toothpick he'd been chewing, before talking.

"Listen, buddy, my sister's Kaoru..."

"So there's the resemblance. You three have gorgeous hair."

"What the…? Listen, manly man, Kaoru's been raving about you since she met you and she'd been miserable for the last week. So can you do us both a favor and tell her you are not interested in her so we can go on with our lives?"

"What?" Asked Kenshin, with a gentle smile.

"You heard us, dump her so we can be at peace." Urged Yahiko, looking angry.

"I understand your suffering, really I do." Said Kenshin, still smiling but now closing his eyes and continuing. "And I am sorry for all the trouble Kaoru-dono has brought to you."

"So you'll do it."

"I'm afraid not."

"What? Why not!"

"I'm afraid I have been _raving_ about her too, but she is so modest and shy I am more worried about mortifying her with my proposal for a date than anything else." Yahiko's jaw dropped, while Sano just chuckled.

"So you are in love with my little sister, huh?"

"Indeed, I even failed my last term as well in order to share the next term with her."

"I'm afraid I can't let you date her. With all the problems it's been since the very beginning of the semester I can't allow you to ruin her chances for graduation and a good educated life; I don't have it and I've known hardships. I won't have Kaoru go through all of that. And I'm paying for that education, by the way."

"Tell that to my tutor, he thinks the same way." Sano dropped his sweater, and cracked is knuckles, while Yahiko just stared at them both, surprised in how quickly this fight was developing.

"I'm going to have to give you a good whooping for this then."

"Only if we make a small bet." Said Kenshi, finally opening his eyes.

"What?"

"If you win I will dump, as your little brother kindly said, Kaoru. If you lose…"

"You'll take her out on a date on my expense."

"You seem confident."

"I am, I am about to whoop your ass!" By the end of all things Sano was so broken the only things that mend his wounds were the smiles Kaoru gave them when she returned from her $500 dinner with the strong (_wimp!)_ Himura Kenshin was.


	3. Chapter 3

**My Memories of You  
*****_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_***

Four years after his first date with Kaoru, Kenshin, helped by Sano, bought the old dojo. They had developed a good relationship, the brother's in laws, and they even started a business that was making them quite wealthy. Kaoru had finished her Bachelor's, in via to start her master's degree, and the couple was happy. Kenshin was always after her, and Kaoru was always asking to be chased. He was a happy man then; a successful career, money, luxury and was in plans of a total reconstruction of the place; they had the materials bought, some items were custom made and other's as old as the house. Sano helped buy the place because of the large training room, and the old fashioned bathroom. Kenshin had more personal matters; it would become his family's home. He'd considered eventually buying Sano's part, and keeping the property so he could marry comfortably and having a place to bring his new wife, but then why bother? The three brothers and Kenshin had developed an intimate relationship, and it was as if they'd been family forever. Sano had agreed to help Kenshin buy the house because he had won over the family's love; Megumi was her new best friend, Yahiko was always after her for some advice on how to handle swords and Kenshin... Well the redhead was so much in love in her that it was pathetic. But such was love; Sano was happy for his friend. Already engaged to be married, Kenshin was so thrilled that he only spoke about Kaoru, and had his friends going nuts about wedding plans and house arrangements and how good love was...

The train wreck report had situated the accident at 10:23, barely a minute after he'd gotten home. Of course he'd gotten the news much later, about three hours later.

A little funeral was done in Kaoru's honor, even when nothing remained of her body. Kenshin refused to assist, even when it was done in the dojo itself, and a few dozen people asked for him. But Megumi kept a smile on her face, and told to helped the group move on as they were trying to do. Kenshin refused to eat for a while, or any psychological help, Only Sano and Megumi could seem to enter his room to leave food and water and pain pills for him. But nothing worked; he kept trapped in his room not answering to any one and quiet. Sano could hear him sobbing at the wee hours of the night, and it broke his heart.

"He's still waiting for the train to come back." Had mused Megumi, after exiting Kenshin's room one night, crying.

It took ten long months for Kenshin to finally leave his room in total control of his emotions, he would work from home, and so they made the small storage room an office for Kenshin and Sano to work at. At first it was awkward to have him there, quietly dealing with paperwork and sometimes losing him to the photograph of Kaoru he kept on his desk. But Sano knew his friends would eventually get over things. Sometimes he would turn to ask Kenshin something and would see him crying, probably the redhead hadn't noticed it, and Sano would hand him a tissue. Other times the man would ignore the phone, because he wasn't really in the office, but million miles off staring at the garden where Kaoru used to walk by, carrying lunch. But mostly he would work all day and then retire to his room for a while, apparently exhausted.

Megumi had gotten him to eat some healthy stuff, and in matter of weeks Kenshin seemed to be doing better, actually recovering. But it wasn't until Sano got in late one morning that ne noticed why that was; Kaoru's picture had been neatly folded and placed against the desk's surface; he hadn't taken it out just obscured the fact that she wasn't there any more. They never spoke about it.

The day the first anniversary of Kaoru's death came by Sano went to work to realize he was reliving that faithful day again; Kenshin was out, returned and exactly 1:32 p.m. Kenshin lost it; he went nuts trashing his room, screaming at how he'd lost her, how miserable he was, how he'd lost everything he was, anything he needed because of death. Neither of the friends or family knew how to deal with this strange breakdown, and Kenshin was heavily drugged and set to sleep with Megumi beside him.

The next day everything went back to normal.

To say everybody was puzzled was an understatement. But life went on, and more work got done, Kenshin finally moved work to his old office and decided that he couldn't work there any longer so moved the entire office home; thing that vexed secretaries, business partners and Sanosuke. Kenshin traveled mainly by train to finish business deals and such, and returned home as usually calm. He also met the daughter of a very powerful business partner, a woman of pale completion and lovely features; Tomoe her name was and she seemed very interested on him. But Kenshin couldn't really respond to her, he was too much filled with grief. Her father suggested she worked with Kenshin and Sano, being a great record keeper and personal assistant, and so they took her in.

another year went by and the same thing happened. In the second anniversary of Kaoru's death the breakdown was far worse; he broke several items, antiques really, and trashed his room again. It took Sano and Aoshi to hold him down so Megumi could sedate him.

Again the next day things were normal.

That was when Sano decided to move in with Kenshin, so did Yahiko and to some extend Megumi. Kenshin needed them; and only now did they realize; and it helped. When the third anniversary rolled by things were so chaotic, a little messy and worrisome, but not as bad as before. Tomoe was a big help, she kept things quiet, made sure all of Kenshin's paperwork got done (and some of Sano's too) and hid away Kaoru's old photograph. She brought joy to Kenshin's gray life.

To Megumi it was hasty to have Kenshin date Tomoe, it was way too fast; he hadn't really heal of Kaoru's death. And she didn't like the pale beauty, she seemed too perfect. But Misao and Sanosuke believe the older sister to be jealous.

Sano was sort of glad for the dating; but realized Megumi might be right when the fourth anniversary came round. It was the worst episode to date; half the house got trashed when Kenshin couldn't find Kaoru's photograph, and Tomoe was forced by Yahiko and Misao to bring the box of memories out. Only then did Kenshin calmed.

'  
'

Hence Sanosuke was surprised when Kenshin had only thrown a few items about, and was so calmly requesting for hamburgers and ice cream for dinner. The door to the house opened and Megumi hurried in, still trying to take off her shoes.

"I am so sorry I'm late. Traffic was horrible. How is he?"

"Fine." Silence. "He asked for hamburgers and ice cream."

Megumi was confused. "What? Where is he?"

"Shower, he asked me not to call Tomoe and to buy hamburgers and chocolate ice cream." Said Sano, holding Megumi's shoulders. "That means he's better right?" The doctor remained quiet, apparently thinking on how Kenshin's actions defy all reason and logic and the very foundations of the laws of physics, and could only come to a simple conclusion.

"I guess so."

They spent all night remembering love, laughter and tears. Time moves rather fast and soon enough a New Year came round. And again they just get together and share little things; but they all know sadness is something inevitable.

'  
'

"Your brother's gone nuts." Announced Sanosuke, entering Megumi's office without knocking, door ajar and looking completely bewildered. And that was quite the statement coming from such a... how to describe it? _Insane_. Megumi stared at him, worried and annoyed at the same time.

"Have you ever heard of the concept of knocking?"

"If I know I take away the surprise factor."

"Get Out!" she said, kicking him out of her office. After Megumi was done with her patient, who didn't dare look Sanosuke in the eye and was still blushing like a tomato, the doctor called the man in. So Sanosuke entered the office, in a similar manner he'd entered before.

"Kenshin's gone absolutely raving, did you know that? How can I care about knocking on a time like this?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Your brother! He just proposed to the pale broad!"

"Tomoe?" Megumi got up, hurrying to close the door and turning drastically to him. "What are you saying?"

"Takeda offered a deal for the company and Kenshin took it without consulting me. He'll seal the deal marrying the broad." He spelled out simply, annoyed. "He can't marry her! He's not even over Jo-chan yet!"

'  
'

"Yes I heard you," some more garbling on the phone. "Megumi regardless of what Sano thinks I believe I am entitled to go on with my life." A bit of silence. "Yes, I understand, yes. But right now I can't sit and talk about it, why don't we get together for dinner tonight? … I'm sure you'll get there." And Kenshin hung up; he'd been struggling with almost everyone since the news broke out and shaking his head Kenshin just sighed. As he told Megumi he was entitled to go on with his life, many had encouraged him to do so and now that he did the same ones that had been rooting for him were freaking out?

It made no sense.

Probably it was because they didn't understand Kenshin's new and improved vision on marriage. It served to merge industries and families, but since the woman he wished to merge souls with was now gone and unable to marry him… Truth was Kenshin was tired of been alone. Lady Tomoe was a good, gentle and honest woman and it surprised Kenshin the fact that his new surrogated family was scandalized in the fact that he wished to marry her, even if it was a simple arranged marriage. It was true that he had not yet gotten over Kaoru, the mere mention of the name in a crowed place, especially when a man was calling, always made him turn just to make sure it was not his Kaoru. It was pathetic, worrisome and sad, but he still visited several places they used to visit together.

Like the park they usually strolled in, or the coffee shop where she would buy those diet-breaking smoothies and cakes. Or he would just sit under the sakura tree, just because she planted it. He was more than sure he would not come to love Lady Tomoe with all her refined manners and the cooking skills, or even her tea making abilities… But he would get busy, the business was doing great and there were talks of expansions all over the city, and probably to Kyoto. He'd started training again, that kept him busy for hours in the weekends, and why not? He might even fall for Tomoe, given enough time.

The door opened, and the woman stepped into the office, balancing a tray with tea and cakes while some folders hung from under her arm. Kenshin moved quickly towards her and took the folders, announcing his wishes to help her. "You didn't have to bring the files, I'm sure the interns would have copied everything."

"I wanted to help." She murmured, blushing.

"You are helping already." He said smiling, and walked with her to the desk.

"I've brought tea, it's almost three already."

"You are a lifesaver, that you are." He mused moving around the desk to sit back down. His cell phone started ringing again, the screen announcing it was Sano and Kenshin just ignored it. "Would you have tea with me?"

"Are you going to answer that?"

"No, that I will not." And he lifted one of the little cakes and tasted.

Yep, he could get used to this.


	4. Chapter 4

**My Memories of You  
*****_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_***

Author's Ramblings: I think this is the first chapter presenting conflict, of course conflict different than the fact Kaoru is dead… Hey don't stare at me like that! Just read… Jeeze such harshness…

'  
'

"I met a man and his gorgeous! I wanna marry him!" Her enthusiastic blue eyes usually shinning with delight were not shinning with purpose and it worried her friend to no end. "I mean it, he will be mine!"

"Misao you said that three times in the past month, I don't think it'll happen, as said before."

"The only difference is that this particular man has seen me naked before."

"What?"

"He is Aoshi, my darling, loving Aoshi-sama!" And she started dancing round the dressing room, her two co-workers watched as she did so; her twirling was well choreographed, and suddenly stopped by the sudden appearance of their boss Kamatari. The two women let out a scream of surprise as the man entered their dressing room without permission and although truth they respected his sexual preferences, that did not give him permission to see them half naked.

"Kamatari! I swear I'll kill you!"

"Get dressed ladies, you are late!"

"We are not late, it's barely twelve thirty!"

"The crowd outside makes it feels like one fifty! Move it we have a huge rush and can't help them all without enough employees!"

"Hai, hai." Said Misao, putting on her shirt while her partner, Maki, just shook her head and put on her working shoe. Kamatari mumbled something incoherent, and walked out the dressing room quickly, but not before screaming at them to hurry.

"So you know Aoshi?"

"His family lived next to ours in Kyoto, and he moved away to study, I think to America, and I haven't seen him in years. Last night he came knocking and I was home! And Oh. My. God. He is _so_ hot!" She put on her own shoes, and fixed her ponytail braid, before joining Maki on the door. "He'll be mine."

"Sure."

"I'm serious here. He's mine."

"If he's so hot, why isn't he married?"

"Too busy with work and studies?"

"Or maybe he just likes girls like Kamatari."

"That's just… depressing Maki!" A moment of silence. "Then I'll have to save him from his ways and bring him to the right path."

"As if…"

"I invited him to visit today, he loves tea and we serve the best one in the city so he'll drop by to taste and let me know."

"I see."

"Girls!"

"Coming!"

'  
'

The café was so busy that day there was little time to talk with Misao. The hype of this new man in her life was hilarious, although even Katamari had noted her determination. Misao was now more concerned about the fact that her date (if it could be called that) had not yet made it in. Maki was still tending tables when the crowd eases and Misao was sent out to her break. They would have to work for a few more hours, and they needed the money so they kept the complaints between them and helped out.

Misao was lifting her legs over the bench in the changing room when the door opened and Tsubame entered; Tsubame was a nice teenager, a gorgeous girl with dark looks, looking a lot like Maki, who was working part time to cover expenses because she lived alone. Both Maki and Tae had taken the girl under their wing, and in the way they had become quite fond of her. "Oh, hi Misao."

"Hey girl."

"Hard day?"

"You won't believe how hard this day had been." She said with a smile. "Get ready for quite the crowd."

"Is Maki in? I brought her the handbag she wanted."

"What handbag?" And Tsubame pulled out an old fashioned blue hand bag, with flowers and a thick silky cord that looked delicate enough. "That'll look nice on her." Misao had created a thick bond with Maki through the two years they've known each other, they had bonded, and often were accused of been sisters. It wasn't such a bad thing, because they lived together, but for a while it was rather awkward. "I bet she'll pair it with that blue kimono of hers."

"I heard she wanted it for the purple one."

"I have no idea why she loves kimono's so much, she's such an old fashioner."

"Well, considering who she is… it's no mystery."

"Maybe you are right." And Tsubame put her thing inside her locker, and started to change. "I have a friend coming over, so don't be alarmed if you see a hunk of a man in the shop."

"I've seen plenty hunks in the shop, my biggest worry is that Katamari always nears them."

'  
'

When Tsubame entered to work Maki was sent out to her break, and she was told her new hand bag was over the table. Excited she hurried to their break room and quickly searched for the item. Misao was still sitting, now her legs were up over the table, and smiled as Maki checked the item. "I love it; don't you think it's cute?"

"It is. It'll go great with the blue and purple kimono."

"That's why I ordered this color." Along with her part time job Tsubame also had a small catalog of clothes and sold them, there's where Maki ordered. Tae entered the room at that moment, looking quite stressed.

"Girls, you won't believe the day I've had. Oh what a cute bag!"

"Thanks!"

"The banks are full, the streets are mad and there's this report of robbers in the area that is frightening even me. And you guys know I don't deal with robbers!"

"Relax, if there are robbers in the area I got a cute cop coming."

"What?"

"A new target." Said Miki, nodding towards Misao, who frowned at the two of them before arguing.

"My next husband!" Said Misao, indignation evident in her voice.

"That's what you said about Soujiru, and then Enishi, and finally…"

"Saito."

"I never said that about Saito, he's a psycho!"

"We are just kidding!"

"Girl! I need help out here!" Cried Kamatari, making Misao sigh along with Tae. Smiling Maki watch them go, willingly, and looked down at her bag. The insides were covered in silk, then outsides clean and well detailed. She caressed the design of flowers and was hit by the utter similarity of this sakura blooms with the ones at the back of her apartment. Or maybe…

_The sound of a child laughing, and then blue tile hit her, as it usually did making her hand fall over her hands as she waited the flash to back out. But it didn't, and something akin to a memory found it way towards her, water was splashing all over her, even when cold and suddenly, she laughed and heard someone laughing with her. And this time it was a man..._

A cry made her wake up, and look up. The café at the other side of the door was suddenly quiet, and someone was screaming orders. Maki had always been curious and although her feet ached, she stood and walked towards the door. A man was holding Tsubame and had a gun pointed at the girl's head. Anger suddenly boiled inside her, and without thinking much she hurried out; the whole scene was revealed: A robber holding a hostage, a tall handsome police officer serving as negotiator and holding a gun pointed at the man's head… Maki didn't have any of it.

"Stop or I swear I'll shoot!"

She acted without thinking, thing that was never seen on her, and neared the man.

"Stop I say!"

"Maki san!"

Maki's hand shot forward, grazing Tsubame's forehead, her finger's grabbed the robber's clothes and she pulled; the man let go of Tsubame with a shocked expression, and was kicked on the gut, and then dropped to the ground with a duplex that had everyone's jaw dropping.

"Oh My God! It's the Japanese Cyclone Duplex Hold!"

"I've never seen such an obscure move up close!" Called Tae, searching for her cell phone in her pocket to take a picture while the guest of the café stared in amazement.

"I can't believe someone I know can do it!" Said Misao excited, and cheering Maki on.

All the while, with the girls cheering their co-worker and friend on, and the robber crying out in pain, the cop stared at the scene in silence, putting his gun away. He narrowed his eyes at the girl, and watched as she got up and looked surprised at what she'd done. Her expression was one of confusion and although even her boss was congratulating her she didn't know how she'd done such a thing. Such an obscure move, such skills and agility; sure she was rusty, but there was something in her that called out to his memory. He had seen her before and to his own astonishment he could not remember where.

An hour or so later the place was been cleaned up by the cops, statements were been taken and the woman was sitting over a booth, a cup of tea in her hands. It wasn't until then that Aoshi Shinomori made his way towards her.

"Ma'am. I would like to ask you a few questions."

"Sure." She said, looking tired. Aoshi had a few questions scribbled down on his notepad but instead he just looked at her right in the eyes, completely serious.

"Have we met before?"

The woman just frowned at him.


	5. Chapter 5

**My Memories of You  
*****_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_***

Author's ramblings: I'm in a writing streak here! I have around five chapters of this baby written, not edited, but hey! I couldn't be happier!

'  
'

One month after his engagement Kenshin was sure no one was happy with his idea, but the thought was finally sinking in. Kenshin himself didn't expect everyone to accept the idea right away but with time and lots of patient he will make them see that it was for his good, as well as their own. Tomoe was a good woman, continued to prove so and was gaining everyone's care day by day.

Sano was now convinced this was what Kenshin wanted, and Megumi was as quiet as ever about the idea. Yahiko was the only one who didn't seem to buy the whole thing; he continued to fight Kenshin and avoid the man.

It hurt Kenshin to no extend.

After Kaoru's dead both Sano and Kenshin had watched over the boy, and Sano had tried to finish the boy's training but he wouldn't have it. Yahiko's grades had dropped considerably, his attitude had changed in 180 degrees and since the wedding was announced he was growing even wilder. Sano was about to kill the boy, and if it weren't for Megumi and Kenshin he might have already.

Kenshin was currently knocking at the boy's door, trying to get him out of the room for a family dinner (with Tomoe included) and there was no answer. Giving up Kenshin just pressed his forehead against the paper door and closed his eyes.

"Yahiko." He said softly. "I know that you hurt, that you miss Kaoru, I know you think I'm trying to replace your sister but I'm not. Nothing in this world could replace Kaoru. But life has to go on, you understand this?"

"I don't care. Go away." Said the muffled voice from inside the room, sounding a little broken. Another sigh left Kenshin and without another word he turned and started to walk out to the dinning area. Sano was there, as well as Megumi and Tomoe, the two women were setting the table and the man was sitting watching TV. A large flower arrangement was on the table, the colors were carefully selected: terracotta and whites, with some soft cream colored flower he didn't know the name of. Kenshin smiled, as Megumi placed a large bowl of salad and sat on the chair.

"What do you think of the flower arrangements?"

"They are gorgeous," answered Megumi, touching the flowers. "What did Yahiko say?"

"He's not having dinner with us." Said Kenshin firmly, while Sano just turned to look at the man.

"Can you blame him?"

"Sano." Warned Megumi as Tomoe entered the room.

"That looks delicious," Said Kenshin immediately, as Tomoe placed a steaming tray of fish and something else over the table.

"Thank you. We are almost ready for dinner." She announced, returned to the kitchen, and followed closely by Kenshin. Megumi turned to Sano, who was rolling his eyes and shaking his head.

"It's pathetic." He murmured, loud enough for her to hear.

"Quiet! We'll talk later."

"You know it's pathetic!"

"Shh!"

Kenshin and Tomoe reentered the dinning room, laughing about some joke and making Sano get up. "I'm gonna get Yahiko, he hadn't eaten all day." And with that Sano left. Megumi smiled at the couple and fixed her napkin to start dinner.

"Is everything alright?"

"Of course, dear. Sano wants to see if he can get Yahiko to dinner."

"Why don't we start, I'm sure Sano won't mind."

"Yeah."

'  
'

Aoshi had been browsing for weeks now and he still could not remember where he'd seen that woman. Misao had been quiet adamant in helping and she'd uncovered files he didn't even remember having. She was quite helpful either way. She was quick archiving files, bringing meals and offering her opinion. Aoshi searched the entire file cabinets in his apartment, and the ones in his office, and was about to give up when Misao came in with a tray of tea and the newspaper.

"Have you found anything?"

"No." And he sighed, leaning over the final box of files he'd had hidden in his attic. Misao frowned, and placed the tea tray over the box. "I know I've met your friend before, Misao. I just know it."

"Maybe the girlfriend of an old acquaintance." She suggested; then looked down at her clock and gasped. "I'm late for work; I'll be around in four hours alright?"

"Sure." And she hurried out the door. Aoshi waved goodbye at her, and took a deep breath and… He frowned, and remembered that case he'd had a few years back.

'  
'

"Now I'm sure neither of the Kamiya brother's like me."

"That's not true." Soothed Kenshin for the tenth time. "They just need time to adjust, that they do." Sano hadn't returned to have dinner and he was sure that when he checked he would find both brothers playing Modern Warfare.

"I can't say Enishi is thrilled with the idea either."

"I'm not worried about Enishi. He's a grown man, Yahiko is still quite susceptible…"

"I know, I know. You've told me about his sister and everything." A moment of silence in which Kenshin just turned his head to the right, to cover the hurt in his eyes. "They just need time, you've said it yourself."

"Yes, of course, time can only tell." And that was the uncomfortable talk they usually had. Why the people around him didn't like her, and why they should get married right away so people gets comfortable with either side. The car they had been waiting for, her ride home, parked before the dojo and a tall driver walked around to open the door. Enishi got out of the limo and fixed his tie while standing next to the car.

"Your watchdog is here." Said the redhead, smiling and making Tomoe swat him playfully.

"Kenshin,"

"You better get going."

"Yes," here was a moment of silence and Kenshin took her hand, prompting her to move closer and in tiptoes they shared a quiet kiss. Interrupted only by Enishi's throat clearing and making them turn.

"Go." Said Kenshin, and they parted ways.

Why did it felt like he was betraying Kaoru every time he kissed her?

'  
'

"Kenshin?"

"Yeah?"

"Can we have a talk?" Kenshin turned to his sister nodding, and locked the door. He could smell coffee, which meant this particular conversation had been put off for some time and walked to the kitchen, finding Megumi fixing two cups of the warm brew. He chose not to ask for the brothers, and took the cup when she offered it. "You are a grown man, Ken."

"Thanks for noticing."

"But you are also an idiot."

"That's not very nice, sis."

"The last time you took a harsh decision it was when you were nineteen."

"I did not. My first car was not a mistake."

"Right it was a disgrace." Kenshin was about to object when Megumi lifted her hand to continue. "But I am not here to talk about your first car. I am here to talk about this Tomoe girl."

"Not you too, please."

"I've always respected your decision, Kenshin. But I honestly think you are making a mistake."

"And why is that?"

"What will happen when the date comes around?"

"I don't…"

"You know perfectly well, Kenshin."

"I guess I'll have to improvise I guess." Megumi threw a glass of cold water over his head. "That's cold, sis."

"It ought to be, it's for you to wake up. Realize that you are making a mistake moron."

"Marriage is just a contract, Megumi, there' nothing I can share with Tomoe beyond a mere contract. I can't love her, as much as I would like to, because I have no idea of how to love another woman. It's ridiculous really, but I can't even kiss her without thinking about Kaoru."

"And you still want to marry her?"

"The company needs the investment. If not we go bankrupt."

"What?"

"We've been doing great, but if we keep the operation going the business will waste more money in maintaining buildings and cars than the product itself. We are going down, whether we like it or not."

"Sano knows this?"

"Yeah," And Kenshin took a drink, he watched Megumi astonished, pull out a bottle of whiskey and pour some into her coffee.

"I can't believe this. We are going bankrupt and you keep it to yourselves?"

"We'll be fine. But if we don't inject some money soon, we are screwed."

"And you offer yourself for the money."

"Better than you or Sano, at least you guys have a chance to be happy. Don't worry about me." Megumi wanted to shout something at the man, but by the expression he held, it would make no difference. In silence they both finished their coffee and went to bed. It wasn't the coffee what kept them awake most of the night.


	6. Chapter 6

**My Memories of You  
*****_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_***

"I think this is it." Said Aoshi, stopping the car before the large gate; he'd been driving all night and was tired, but his GPS kept him awake; the little spot over the address was blinking and beeping. Misao watched the gate as did the woman behind them. "Are you ready?"

"No."

"Good, get out."

"I rather come tomorrow; it's so late as it is…"

"Out." And Aoshi turned the engine off and exit it, while Misao turned to the shaking woman.

"Don't be afraid, I'm sure they'll be relieved."

"Right, right." And the door opened Aoshi's hand extending to help her out. "Misao?"

"Come on, let's do this."

As the women got uot the car, Aoshi rang the bell.

'  
'

"Must be the pizza, can you get it, Ken?" Asked Megumi trying to drag Sanosuke out of the practice hall with Yahiko still trying to get the taller man into a fight. Kenshin, smiling, just agreed and cleaned his hands. HIs sandals were donned as he neared the door and he moved quickly, another pair of knocks were heard and he took a deep breath.

"Hai, hai. Coming." He hurried to the door, unlatched and looked...

Many things had been going through Kenshin's mind. Dinner, the string of Sano and Yahiko's fighting which was on its own bothersome, the stock market, the papers he still had over his desk in need of verification and signatures, the phone calls he had to make and the money he owed Megumi. There was also the little thing with Tomoe and the fixing of the wedding cake, the ribbons for the church's hall and how to explain to Yahiko that he'll have to move with Sano and Megumi when he got married. Not to mention he had to take the car to check the suspension and air conditioning that were faulty.

He'd never expected to open the door to find Kaoru standing there, in her gorgeous yellow kimono and holding a small bag. Kenshin was tempted to slam the door and hurry away but his body froze and none of his limbs were responding.

"Hi!" She said in her usual cheerful self, smiling so brightly and carefree. "Is this the Himura residence?"

Kenshin would have said _yes_, but he fainted. He was oddly aware of her cries and been carried away before total darkness overtook him.

'  
'

"So you were living in Kyoto all these years, and only now realized you didn't belong there?" Asked Megumi, handing Kaoru a cup of warm tea. The girl before them was cheerful, seeming content with holding Yahiko and full of curiosity.

"I was walking with a friend of mine, Misao Makimachi?" None had heard of said person. "She told me that she'd seen a picture of me in an old restaurant."

"The _Akabeko_?"

"Yes, and we went there. The waitress had a similar reaction than Kenshin-san when she saw me. She told me my name and gave me this address..."

"Told you your name?"

"Yes, I suffer amnesia. I was found near the train wreck a few years back, maybe you remember?"

"Boy, do we." Said Sano, leaning back on his seat.

"The farmer who found me kept me at his place overnight and then no emergency teams could reach me for two weeks. When the doctor checked me he said I was perfectly fine, but had a nasty bump on my head."

"And that produced the amnesia. You don't remember anything, at all?" Asked Megumi, knowing the clinical case.

"Sometimes, flashes of red and amber hit me. Other's just laughter and voices I can't make out. One day, I dreamed walking through an old house, like this dojo, and fixing the plumbing of an old bathroom."

"With white and blue tiles?"

"Yes."

"Come with me, Kaoru. I want to show you something." Megumi got up, and Kaoru set her cup down to follow. They moved through the hallway and Kaoru just looked around surprised. Behind them Yahiko and Sano, egging the results of whatever Megumi was doing.

"But this..." Soon they were moving into the bathroom, and while the boys stayed outside Kaoru looked around the little room, as Megumi opened the cupboard doors to reveal a set of old pipes.

"Is this the plumbing work you were doing in your dream?" Kaoru took longer than needed to answer.

"This is the house?" Her voice was small, frightened almost.

"Kaoru," Megumi moved to her, placing both hands on the girl's shoulders and squeezing softly. "This is your house. Kenshin bought it for you, and was fixing things up for when you two got married."

Kaoru's face twitched and tears filled her eyes. "Then the ring is mine? I wasn't holding it for someone like she said?"

"Ring?" Sano asked from the door, frowning.

"What ring?" Kaoru sniffled and searched around her neck pulling out a chain with a ring and diamond dangling from it.

"I had it one the day of the accident, but she said I was using some else's ring, that it had brought back luck and the accident had happened?"

"She? Whose she?"

"My protector: Lady Takeda."

Megumi turned to Sano whose eyes widened and then hurried out. "Let's go back to the living room, alright?" And in the way Megumi let out a laugh. "You know: I'm so glad you're back! To see Kenshin faint like that was memorable!"

'  
'

"Amnesia is really difficult thing. Anything can trigger the return of memory, or nothing will. Sometimes it's a gradual process and others a swift swing. Only time can tell." Said Megumi to the little crowd after Kaoru had asked if her memory would ever return. Yahiko remained quiet while another round of tea was handed. "Let's all hope, for Kenshin's sake, that you remember quickly. Besides been in familiar environment is good for the return of memories."

"How long have I lived here?"

"You moved in with Kenshin a year before the accident. Six months before the accident you were already talking marriage and furniture. Yahiko can tell you other details too."

"And you are my little brother?"

"Yep, ten years younger." He said proudly. "You've been taking care of me since I can remember."

"And our parents?"

"They both passed away, I remember Pappa a bit but only images." Kaoru nodded and smiled at her little brother. Suddenly she lifted both arms and pulled him in for a tight hug.

"I'm so sorry I left you alone all these years. Where you frightened?" He only nodded, and Kaoru covered him from the world, shielding his little boy's soul. "I promise not to leave again."

Heavy fast footsteps were heard and Sano let out a deep breath. "He's awake." The door to the tea room opened and Kenshin was there, clothing askew, hair all messy and eyes wide. Every eye turned to him, noticing how his breaths were deep and ragged, how he seemed horrified but glad to be there... A whole lot mix of emotions ran through his eyes in a kaleidoscope of fear and hope. "Kaoru-dono?"

"Hai!" She said, not really knowing what she was doing, mixing her response with a smile that simply returned his soul home. Funny; how long had his soul been away, wondering in pain for her soul? Once his soul and body had merged the first step taken was the most painful one, it was realization of reality the grounding of hopes. The second was also painful but with the hasty flood of emotions it meant the fire that had once been put out in his body was violently stuck back to life, he was whole again. The third and fourth were almost the point to break into a run; there was the object of his desires, the love of his life, the reason for his body to still draw breath.

"Kaoru-dono, Kaoru-dono, Kaoru-dono..." The mantra repeated in his soft voice, as if he couldn't believe she was actually there. As a matter of fact he couldn't believe it; he wanted all these years to pass, as if a dream and wake up only to find her here, taking tea and talking about life in general as if nothing had happened. He knelt before her, burring his face into the silk of her yellow kimono, surprising the woman. Kenshin finally cried, probably he'd cried before but not as heartbreaking as this time. Here she was alive! Alive! _Where have you been my love, I've been waiting_. His soul begged for a moment of love, anything that let her know she had also missed him, was it too little to task, too much probably?

Suddenly the soft fingers of Kaoru's combed his messy hair soothing without words. Kenshin looked up, and saw she was crying as well and all was well with the world.

'  
'

"Sano I don't care." Said Kenshin, sitting before his desk, typing furiously at the undeserving keyboard. He needed to finish this and settle things with Takeda before it was too late: Sano had come in and was babbling about something involving Tomoe but at the moment he honestly did not care.

"Well I do!" Roared the older brother to the love of Kenshin's life, making the much shorter man turn, stopping his typing. "I want to understand why they did this to me, us, you!" Kenshin just stared at him, obvious of the confusion in the man's head; if it weren't because he'd pinched his cheek and arms several times, enough to draw blood, Kenshin would be in a similar state. "Just call the Takeda broad and ask her why." Kenshin frowned.

"Why what?"

"The Takeda broad is who kept Kaoru away all this time! Ask her if she wants to go to jail before or after explaining things to us!" Cried Sano, angered by his friend's stupidity…

Until Kenshin's eyes turned amber and his skin tensed, the temperature of the room dropped considerably and the keyboard was pushed back with a swift swipe of hands, almost as if cleaning the blood off a blade. "_What_?"


End file.
